Child Criminals
by hadesgirl015
Summary: A sequel to my other story "Tiny Criminals" due to another messed up jutsu courtesy of Tobi half the Akatsuki are de-aged to the age and mind of small children. So of course their remaining partners have to take care of them. Which babysitter will crack first, and what kind of havoc will be dished out. Read and find out
1. Another Jutsu

Summery: A sequel to my other story "Tiny Criminals" due to another messed up jutsu courtesy of Tobi half the Akatsuki are de-aged to the age and mind of small children. So of course their remaining partners have to take care of them. Which babysitter will crack first, and what kind of havoc will be dished out. Read and find out.

Chapter 1: Another Jutsu

The Akatsuki were sitting around the kitchen, Hidan, covered in blood from sacrificing some poor person who was camping to close to the base.

"It's strangely quiet." Itachi muttered.

"Hey, where's Tobi, un?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah, where is the little piece of shit?" Hidan asked.

"Must you swear so constantly?" Kakazu asked.

"Got a problem you—" Hidan started but the rest of his sentence was cut off by, an annoying voice.

"LEADER-SAMA! EVERYONE!"

"Well there's Tobi." Sasori said.

"And there goes the silence." Konan said.

Tobi ran into the room. "Tobi has made another jutsu!"

"It won't shrink us again will it, un?" Deidara asked.

"No!" Tobi said.

"What will it do?" Kisame asked.

"Well that's what Tobi wants to try out!" Tobi said.

"Why not try it out on your rabbit?" Zetsu asked. **"Maybe it will kill it. The evil thing."**

"Peanut is not evil!" Tobi said.

"Didn't it try to eat Zetsu?" Itachi asked.

"Peanut was hungry and he thought Zetsu-san was food." Tobi defended.

"Enough," Pein said. "Tobi if you are going to do it, just do it already."

"Kodomo no jutsu." Tobi said a long with some hand signs. A cloud of smoke enveloped: Zetsu, Deidara, Hidan, Itachi, and Pein then disappeared a long with those members. "Tobi! What did you do this time!" Konan yelled, which was followed by four childish screams and movement to separate corners of the room. In each corner, stood a child, cowering in fear, but there was also a child standing defiantly where the disappeared members once stood. "What's just happened?" Sasori asked. "Who are you?" asked the child standing in the center of the room. "We are the Akatsuki." Kisame said. "What are the Akatsuki, I have never heard of them." the child said. "Why not tell us who you are." Konan said. The child seemed to study them first before answering. "I'm Itachi Uchiha." 


	2. Explanations

Chapter 2: Explanations "I'm Itachi Uchiha." said the boy. After he said that, the others could see it. He had the same black hair and obsidian eyes that Itachi had when his Sharingan was not activated. "How old are you?" Kisame asked. "I'm four." Itachi said. "So if this is Itachi," Konan said. She looked in the other corners, one corner had a child with a black side and white side, obviously Zetsu. Another child had bright white hair and was covered in what seemed to be blood, okay Hidan. In another corner sat a little girl, where did she come from? The last corner had a pale kid with bright red hair which mostly covered his purple eyes with a bull's eye pattern. Konan approached this child. "Nagato?" "How do you know my name?" Nagato asked. "Where are my parents?" "Your parent's sent you here for a vacation. To get you out of the rain." Konan said. "Is that the same with me?" Itachi asked. "Is it because my mom is about to have a baby?" "Yeah. Babies are a lot of work, they want someone who can keep a good eye on you." Kisame said. "How old are you?" Konan asked. "Five." Nagato said. Konan gave him a smile. Kakazu went over to the kid that was obviously Hidan, who seemed like he was about to have a panic attack. "Hidan?" Kakazu questioned. "Is this blood?" Hidan asked. "Yes." Kakazu said bluntly without really thinking. "BLOOD! BLOOD! GET IT OFF ME! AM I GOING TO DIE!?" Hidan yeled. "Whoa calm down." Kakazu said. "You are fine." Grabbing a damp cloth and rubbing the blood off of Hidan. "How old are you?" "Five." Hidan said. Soon enough all the blood was off Hidan. "What am I doing here?" Hidan asked. "We are just going to care for you for a while." Kakazu said. "Okay." Hidan said. The next kid to be questioned was obviously Zetsu, they could tell because he still had his white a black sides. Tobi went up to him. "Hi Zetsu-san!" "Hi." **"Dummy! Don't talk to strangers!" **Zetsu said. "But, he seems so nice." **"Those are the ones you got to watch out for!" ** "How old is Zetsu-san?" Tobi asked. "Three!" Zetsu said, sticking out three pudgy white fingers. **"Don't talk to him!" **"But he is nice." While the two Zetsus were indulged in their childish argument Sasori went over to the remaining child. The child had long blonde hair and bright blue eyes, with bangs covering the left eye. The child was also attempting to hide their hands. "Hey there." Sasori said. "Who are you, un." The child asked. 'Wait, 'un', its Deidara!' Sasori thought, 'Gosh he looked even more like a girl now then when he is older.' "I'm going to watch you for a bit, can you tell me how old you are?" Sasori asked. "I'm six, un." Deidara said. "And my name is Deidara. AND I AM A BOY!" "So, I guess same protocol as last time." Kisame said. "Yeah," Konan said. "Come with me Nagato, you can come to my room and do something fun." She smiled and held out her hand, which Nagato took and left the room, somewhat happily with Konan. "What do you want to do?" Kisame asked Itachi. "Can I train?" Itachi asked. Kisame was surprised, a four year old wanted to train? "Sure, we have some good training spots." The two of the left the room. "Does Zetsu-san want to play something with Tobi?" Tobi asked. **"****Say no!"** Zetsu screamed. "YES!" **"DUMMY! Don't say you will play with him alone in a room!" ** But white Zetsu ignored his black counterpart and forced them to walk out with Tobi. Kakazu turned to Hidan who seemed to be expecting himself for injury. "What would you like to do?" "Do you maybe, have books?" Hidan asked. Kakazu was as surprised as Kisame was with Itachi if not more. His loud annoying partner who constantly cursed, had not cursed since the jutsu and wanted to be quite. Then add to the fact that he seemed to hate the idea of his blood on him, even if just a short time ago he lost half of his blood due to self injury. "We should have some somewhere." Kakazu said walking out of the room, followed by Hidan. Leaving Sasori alone with the six year old Deidara. 


	3. Secrets

Chapter 3: Secrets Sasori turned to Deidara, who was still hiding his hands. "Hey brat, is there something wrong with your hands?" Sasori asked. "No," Deidara said quickly. "Well," Sasori said, slightly awkward. "How about we just find something to do in the room." "Okay, un." Deidara said, and Sasori led the way to the room, with a clay wall. Deidara stared at said wall. "What happened there?" Sasori knew he should probably lie somewhat, because obviously Deidara had none of his older memories. "The last brat blew it up, we haven't really had a chance to fix it completely yet." "Oh." Deidara said. He was still hiding his hands. "Are those puppets?" "Yeah." Sasori said. "I'm a puppet master. It is kind of my art." "Do they explode, un?" Deidara asked. "No." Sasori said. "Art is a bang, un." Deidara muttered. "Brat, why do you keep hiding your hands?" Sasori asked, ignoring the comment about art. "No, reason, un." Deidara said. "Then let me take a look." Sasori said, stepping towards Deidara. Deidara took several steps back, before he hit one of the walls that weren't clay. "It's kind of a secret, un." "Secret huh?" Sasori asked. "How about this?" Deidara looked at Sasori questionably. "I show you a secret, and you show me yours." Sasori said. "Alright, un." Deidara said after some thought. Sasori took off his cloak, revealing his puppet body. "I'm a puppet." "Whoa." Deidara said. "Hey mister you never told me your name un." Trying to prolong showing the puppet man his hands. "My name is Sasori." Sasori said. "Now, brat, it's your turn." Deidara nervously showed Sasori his hands, revealing the mouths on them. "I'm a freak, un." Turning his head the other way. 'Is this what the kid was so upset over?' Sasori asked himself. He got down on one knee, and grabbed one of his hands, ignoring the licking tongue. "Deidara, brat, you are not a freak, there are much weirder things around here." "Really, un?" Deidara asked. "That woman with the blue hair, can turn herself into paper." Sasori said. "That blue guy is basically half shark. And the other guy, who had stitches, he has five hearts." Deidara gave a small laugh, "That is kind of weird, un." Sasori smiled, a real, gentle smile, he couldn't remember the last time he did that. "Sasori-san, do you maybe have clay, un?" Deidara asked. "Tons of it, the last brat loved clay." Sasori said. "Can I have some, please, un?" Deidara asked. "Sure, brat." Sasori said without thinking but when he turned back around to hand Deidara some clay, the six year old had tears in his eyes. "What's wrong brat?" "Why do you keep calling me that, un?" Deidara sniffed. "What?" Sasori asked. "Brat." Deidara said. "Did I do something bad, un?" "What? No, of course not brat!" Sasori said. "Then why do you keep calling me brat, un?" Deidara asked, he sounded like he was about to start sobbing. "I'm not calling you a brat." Sasori said, kneeling in front of Deidara. "It's," he paused trying to come up with something. "It's like a pet name. It means I care for you Dei." Deidara sniffed. "Really?" "Yeah. Come here, brat, do you need a hug?" Sasori asked. Deidara didn't move for a moment, but then he barreled into Sasori nearly knocking him over. After a long hug and some comfort Deidara looked up at Sasori. "What do I call you?" "The last one called me 'danna.' You could use that if you want." Sasori said. "Okay Danna!" Deidara said. "Can I play with that clay now?" "Sure thing brat." Sasori said, handing the clay over, silently praying to Kami that Deidara would not blow it up. 


	4. Reasons

Chapter 4: Reasons Kakazu and Hidan were sitting in the bed room. Kakazu was counting money, and Hidan was reading a book. The book was a short chapter book, probably meant for a seven or eight year old but five year old Hidan was reading it just fine, minus every so often asking what a word was. "Um, Kakazu, what's, um…?" Hidan asked. "What's the word?" Kakazu asked. "I can't pronounce it." Hidan said. "Spell it." Kakazu said. "S-q-u-i-r-r-e-l." Hidan pronounced every letter carefully. "That is 'squirrel.' I think you know what it is. Rodent that eats nuts and climbs trees." Kakazu said. "Oh, okay." Hidan said, and was quite for so long Kakazu began to worry. "Hidan why are you so quite? Most boys your age are rowdy as hell." Kakazu asked. "Reasons." Hidan said. "Reasons?" Kakazu asked. "Don't you have reasons for what you do?" Hidan asked, looking over his book. "But why are you so quite?" Kakazu asked. This child version of his partner was nothing like the normal version. "Because, Ms. Otake said people don't want rowdy misbehaved boys." Hidan said. Kakazu didn't asked who Ms. Otake was but was beginning to question why Hidan seemed to respect what she said. He continued to work until he heard a small explosion in the base. "Shit, that is going to cost some money." Kakazu said. Hidan gasped. "You said a bad word." "Yeah?" Kakazu asked. "You shouldn't say bad words." Hidan said. "And why do you say that?" Kakazu asked temporary forgetting the Hidan was five. "Reasons." Hidan said like it was obvious. "And what reasons would that be?" Kakazu asked. "Ms. Otake said you shouldn't say bad words like that and, the 'd-word' and 'f-word' because they are very bad." Hidan said. This surprised Kakazu because it seemed like Hidan's favorite pass time, when he was older, besides killing, was cussing. "Who is Ms. Otake?" Kakazu asked. "Shouldn't you know? You are taking me off her hands for a while." Hidan asked. "I didn't arrange this, my boss did, I was just told to watch you." Kakazu said. "Ms. Otake runs the orphanage." Hidan said. "Orphanage?" Kakazu questioned. Thing "Yeah, where I live." Hidan said. Kakazu remembered, when Hidan went into his panic and started to stab himself repeatedly a while ago he said he had always been alone. "My mother dumped me there when I was born." Hidan said sadly, putting his book down. "No one wants me." "Don't say that." Kakazu said, trying to calm him down before he went into hysterics. "No one will adopt me, and Ms. Otake obviously doesn't want me because she dumped me here." Hidan said. "MY OWN MOTHER DIDN'T EVEN WANT ME!" And the sobbing began. Kakazu stared dumbstruck. He had no idea how to deal with a sobbing child who obviously felt so alone. So he did the only thing he could think to do. He enveloped Hidan in a hug and let him sob into his chest, rubbing his back, trying to sooth the poor boy. After a few minutes Hidan's sobs turned into hiccoughs. "Why?" "Why what?" Kakazu asked. "Why are you comforting me?" Hidan asked. "I have my reasons." Kakazu said. "I just want a family." Hidan said. "We are like your family now." Kakazu said. "Until I have to go back." Hidan said. Kakazu stroked Hidan's hair in a comforting manner. "That may be a while. Until then, if you have any problems, you can come to me." "Really?" Hidan asked. "Yes." Kakazu said. After a few moments of silence he decided to break it. "Are you hungry?" "Yeah." Hidan said. And the two left, to go get some food. **A/N With 5 year old Hidan read a book meant for 7-8 year olds. I work in the 2****nd**** and 3****rd**** grade class at my school for a period every day. And we have a 5 year old kindergartner doing the language arts so Hidan is just advanced in reading. **


End file.
